Spawnicus disease

I call it Spawnicus disease because diseases are often named after the first victim.

Spawnicus disease is, essentially, a cold that wont go away, and therefore is infinitely worse than any other disease known to man!!

I have now been ill for just about 2 weeks with this bloody thing, and just can't shift it.  In fact this morning I feel worse than I have done for about a week... why am I getting worse again?!

Once I complete my world domination I will have my top scientists working on a cure for this debilitating illness... until then, can someone pass me the tissues?!

Get out of the f'ing way!!

So I left my house this morning, and outside the next door neighbour's was some random woman in a Vauxhall somethingorother.  Just sitting in her car, engine off, in the middle of the road, with cars on both sides.

So I've gotten in my car, and switched the engine on, thinking that would prompt her to move... it didn't.  I sounded the horn, thinking that would prompt her to move... it didn't... then I edged forwards so that she could see I was pulling out, and sounded the horn again... she still sat there doing nothing... only this time I got some strange gesture... I think she was signalling that she was waiting for the girl who lives next door to me, or she could have been saying it was the name of a book, 1 word, 4 syllables...

Finally the girl next door got in the car, and off they went.  Now why on earth could this woman not have pulled her car into the gigantic gap on the left just in front of her so that I could pass? 

Does she think she owns the road or something?!  She doesn't own the road, it's MY road... I've lived in it nearly all my life... actually by that logic it's Doris' road, she's lived there since it was all mud huts and the only traffic was the occasional stegosaurus wandering through.

But I digress... random Vauxhall woman, next time you get in my way I'm going to slash your tyres... promptly followed by your face... not that it would make you look any worse.

Rant over

Cars...

So the little Ignis is finally dying a death, the catalyst is shot to pieces, it gets through petrol like there's no tomorrow, the back passenger side tyre leaks air faster than a punctured beach ball, the windscreen has at least 3 noticeable chips in it, and it's just generally had it.

So I started looking around for another car a few weeks ago, an automatic so the other half can drive it (if I let her near my new car).

I've never liked estate cars, but I was on Autotrader and saw a Renault Megane estate (or to give it the proper name - Sports Tourer) and surprised myself by really liking the look of it.

Did a bit of reading up on them, and went to see it.  Drives like a dream, it's quiet and comfortable, with a few gadgets (most importantly aircon) to keep me going.

So having had the AA inspection done in it I'm waiting for it to be ready... and the wait is excruciating!! 

Unfortunately I've now decided I want a new model Megane Coupé... so before I've even got the Sports Tourer I'm planning it's replacement!!

How to piss off the boss

So the boss has gone off on business, he wasn't meant to be in the office today and so my lovely and charming colleague decided that she'd buy breakfast for herself and I. 

I got a call from the boss this morning to see if he'd left the power cable from his laptop in the office, and he had. 

So I text said colleague to say the boss was coming in, but she didn't see it.

So she turns up in the office with two breakfasts, and a look on her face that says "oh shit... what have I done?!"

The boss did not look amused... oops!!